Trust Misplaced Brings Disappointment

Placing complete trust in physicians will only keep you chronically ill and dependent on drugs. When I think back to my choice to have surgery in 2007 and to have chemotherapy in 2009, I wish that spiritually I would have been then where I am today, because trust, it never would have happened! So after my friend laid hands on me and prayed for me, I left work that day feeling like I had new lungs!  That night, I went to bed feeling the best I had felt in years. I was fast asleep then suddenly, while laying on my stomach with my hands/arms apart, a dreadful feeling was upon me, which I have experienced frequently since 1995. I could not move or speak, but I could hear myself screaming at the top of my lungs. The medical community would call it “sleep paralysis” but at the end of the day, it was a pre-cursor of a demonic attack. Suddenly my hands, which were a part, were bound together then this entity proceeded to blow in my face. Because this wasn’t the first time this had happened to me, I feared what this could mean for my health and healing, so I thought, let me hold my breath. Needless to say, that did not work as this entity continued to blow in my face without so much as taking a break. Something had to give and because I was not spiritually prepared to deal with what was happening, I gave up and breathed and waited until the ordeal was over. I had this sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, that what happened could not be good for my lungs and it was not.

Trust Misplaced

By August 2008, I moved back to Florida for a new job, and by early February 2009, I was taken off steroids after being on them for about 2 years. Eighty pounds later, there was no visible improvement in the condition of my lungs as they looked the same way they did back in 2007 prior to the biopsy. Within weeks, plantar fasciitis began and I had no idea why my feel hurt so bad. Life became so difficult and work stressful, but by March 2009 I completed my Master’s degree, paid off my car, but by April 14, 2009, I would be laid off from the job I started back in 2008. Then, upon CT-scans, blood work and breathing tests, I was eventually diagnosed with Lupus and then told I needed to start chemotherapy, which I felt very pressured into doing. I was made to believe that the chemotherapy regimen would eliminate the inflammation in my lungs which was a must due to the potential scarring that could occur due to the inflammation. My dear friend that had prayed and laid hands on me a year prior, was in town and she called her husband to pray for me “For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them” (Matthew 18:20). Unfortunately due to fear I placed my trust in the doctors and in my family, when I should have placed my complete trust in The Most High, who hadn’t let me down ever. Out of sheer desperation, I elected to do chemotherapy and I started a week later. To this day, it is one of my greatest regrets.

“The blessing of the Most High, it makes rich, and He adds no sorrow with it” (Proverbs 10:22).

“My son, in thy sickness be not negligent: but pray unto The Most High, and he will make thee whole. Leave off from sin, and order thine hands aright, and cleanse thy heart from all wickedness. Give a sweet savour, and a memorial of fine flour; and make a fat offering, as not being. Then give place to the physician, for The Most High has created him: let him not go from you, for you have need of him. There is a time when in their hands there is good success. For they shall also pray unto The Most High, that he would prosper that, which they give for ease and remedy (cure) to prolong life. He that sins before his Maker, let him fall into the hand of the physician” (Sirach 38: 9-15).

Trust and Still No Visible Improvement

After three months of chemotherapy and no visible improvement in my lungs, the dose was increased for the last three months. After six whole months of chemotherapy, my lungs had not changed one bit and the physician proceeded to inform me that they would place me on oral chemotherapy, in addition to two other medications that they noted could affect my eye sight. I essentially told them, by my actions, where they could put the medications and I disappeared for three years. Imagine that, to trust in the physicians and their claims only to be disappointed in the end and left feeling like a guinea pig. My trust was misplaced which was my first mistake, but that will not happen again. The side effects of the chemotherapy (hot flashes, forty pound weight gain in four months) took hold which led me to go back to a doctor. Some breathing problems began to creep back in and I was started on medication, not oral chemotherapy, and proceeded on that path until 2016 when I elected to stop taking all medication. I am happy to report that I have been preserved by The Most High and He has been teaching me to depend on Him and Him alone. I will take my chances with The Most High who has a track record of keeping me through thick and in, within and without for He is my Rock and my Healer. At the end of the day, drugs will not cure a spiritual condition which is what I suspect most dis-ease is. Physicians do not have the power to heal, in and of themselves, because all healing comes from The Most High. Aside from Him, there is and will never be healing.

“Bless the Lord, O my soul, and do not forget all his benefits–who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the Pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good as long as you live so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s” (Psalm 103:1-5).

Trust In The Most High and be Preserved 

We are told to pray to The Most High and He will make us whole. We have a vital part to play in our healing, so we cannot afford to be passive or to place our life in the hands of others.  We are to turn away from sin and all wickedness, fast, and pray and should we decide to go to a physician (who should also be praying to The Most High that what he/she prescribes will cure and provide us long life), we will be protected. The drugs that the pharmaceutical companies are pushing out rapidly, are not meant to cure us of anything. They are meant to keep us chronically dependent, ill and demon-possessed because that is how they make their profits. How many medications are marketed as cures for medical conditions? Understand that all these medications do is treat the symptoms, which cause additional side effects, all the while ignoring the root causes because we know there is no profit in cures. In my situation, though I felt better after chemotherapy, visibly there was no improvement in my lungs. I made a choice to stand on the promises of the Most High and to not place my faith in what I could see because if I had, I would have undoubtedly allowed them to do more harm to my temple and I may not have been here today.  I regret chemotherapy because the improvement I felt, I had felt before, without having to get pumped full of poison and all the side effects which are still lingering as of today. I trust in the Most High and I have been preserved without physicians because My Father is the Master Physician to which all other physicians should bow.

Below are just a few scriptures relating to health, healing and faith:

“He said, “If you listen carefully to the voice of The Most High and do what is right in his eyes, if you pay attention to his commands and keep all his decrees, I will not bring on you any of the diseases I brought on the Egyptians, for I am The Most High, who heals you” (Exodus 15:26).

“I will restore health to you, and your wounds I will heal declares The Most High” (Jeremiah 30:17).

“My child, be attentive to my words; incline your ear to my sayings. Do not let them escape from your sight; keep them within your heart. For they are life to those who find them, and healing to all their flesh” (Proverbs 4:20-22).

“Then they cried to The Most High in their trouble, and he saved them from their distresses; He sent his word and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions. Oh that men would praise the Lord for his goodness, and for his wonderful works to the children of men!” (Psalms 107:19-21).

“And you shall serve The Most High your God, and he shall bless your bread, and your water; and I will take sickness away from the midst of you” (Exodus 23:25).

“O Lord my God, I cried to you for help, and you have healed me” (Psalm 30:2).“He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3).

“But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19).

“Who his own self bare our sins in his own body on the tree, that we, being dead to sins, should live unto righteousness: by whose stripes ye were healed(1 Peter 2:24).

“A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit dries the bones” (Proverbs 17:22).

“Behold, I will bring it health and cure, and I will cure them, and will reveal unto them the abundance of peace and truth” (Jeremiah 33:6).

“Thus says The Most High; Cursed be the man that trusts in man, and makes flesh his arm, and whose heart departs from the Lord. For he shall be like the heath in the desert, and shall not see when good cometh; but shall inhabit the parched places in the wilderness, in a salt land and not inhabited” (Jeremiah 17:5-6).

“Blessed is the man that trusts in The Most High, and whose hope The Most High is. For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that spreads out her roots by the river, and shall not see when heat comes, but her leaf shall be green; and shall not be careful in the year of drought, neither shall cease from yielding fruit” (Jeremiah 17:7-8)

“Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for thou art my praise” (Jeremiah 17:14).

“I have seen his ways, and will heal him: I will lead him also, and restore comforts unto him and to his mourners. I create the fruit of the lips; Peace, peace to him that is far off, and to him that is near, says the Lord; and I will heal him” (Isaiah 57:18-19)

“And The Most High shall smite Egypt: he shall smite and heal it: and they shall return even to the Lord, and he shall be entreated of them, and shall heal them” (Isaiah 19:22)

“Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed” (Isaiah 53:4-5).

“And Christ said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If you have faith as a grain of mustard seed, you shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you” (Matthew 17:20).

“But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him” (Hebrews 11:6).

“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you” (Matthew 6:33).

“And all things, whatsoever you shall ask in prayer, believing, you shall receive” (Matthew 21:22).

“And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he hears us: And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him” (1 John 5:14-15).


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